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Priorities - How Do I Choose?

Priorities - our busy lives have thrown so many things at us and suddenly that To Do List becomes longer and longer and it feels as if nothing is being removed from it.   How do we choose which is most important or which can wait?  How can we please everyone?  How can we do it all without burning out?   The short answer is 'we can't'.  However, we can make it less stressful and pick and choose what has to be done now, what can wait, and what does not need to be on that list whatsoever.

One of the most important parts of this is knowing what should and should not be on your list.    Unless you have a baby in the house, the ultimate priority should be YOU.    A baby cannot change, feed or dress itself.  A baby needs to be taught love and shown that he or she matters.  So #1 on your list is to always be either You or if there is a baby in the house, it is baby and then you.

When I teach this, I hear, 'But my husband needs...' 'But my other children need...'  'But my boss needs...' 'But my parents need...' There are always a lot of 'but' and 'needs' that have to do with other people and until you cross over again, there will always be something that comes up.

I will tell you what happens when you tend to everyone else's needs as a priority over yourself.   You end up with disease, sick, sometimes in the hospital and sometimes in a coffin.  You end up unhappy, hurt, vulnerable, worn out and stressed at a whole new level.   I speak from experience.  I was one of those that put others first (my biggest issue was with work) and when I finally reached my breaking point, I ended up with an ailment that lasted for a year, put me in the hospital and 9 years later I am still affected by some of the side effects.

Many of you will say, 'That will never happen to me'.  I was one of them.  I was invincible. I was wonder woman and could do it all and then some.  I was doing the work of three people at work and being told I was being over paid as a woman.  I was always very conscientious of doing the perfect job, making sure everything was done and that I alone would do it all.  When help came, it created more work than I started with so I basically refused all help.  I took everything personally and thought the company would not survive because of the mistakes others were making.  I was wrong in every way.

Spirit had been telling me - 'Walk away, this is not where you are meant to be'.   I didn't listen.  This went on for years and finally one day, I burnt out, had my father's estate to settle, my step-son had committed suicide shortly before my father died, there was my daughter's wedding in between the two deaths and my nephew's wedding just a couple weeks after my father passed.  I was on this up/down, high/low roller coaster that I just could not get off of.   I reached my peak and just out of the blue, typed my resignation and walked away from 8 years of pressure and over-achieving.  I heard how I was called names through the grape-vine (we are in a small community and word spreads a little too much).  I heard that I was cold-hearted for leaving when one of the boss's family members was dying.  It went on and on.  However they had no idea what was going on inside of me and they didn't care.

A few days after my last day at the job, my health declined dramatically.  I was in and out of the hospital for a year receiving blood transfusions, seeing specialists, and ended up spending a majority of the first year in bed, anemic and listless.  During that period there was a lot of time to think and of course the thoughts that came through first were that I'm letting everyone down.  (This was my ego trying to knock me down further.  It was not the reality of things. I was not letting anyone down.)

So at that point, I decided my priority in life was going to be me.  I was going to put no more undue stress on myself. I was going to decide what was most important to me as a person and where I needed to be in my life to be mentally successful.  I started to pamper myself and take 'me' time.  I started to meditate, heal and become a better version of who I was.  I decided to cut out all unnecessary stress from my life and live it as I already knew I should be.  I went inside of myself and found my core truth again.  My core truth is 'I am good enough, I am perfectly perfect, I am who God created me to be, I am only one person and it's okay to ask for help or let things slide, I am not responsible for everyone else or where their life leads, I am only responsible for where I choose to go in my life.'   This was a huge turning point for me. 

I suddenly had a new zest for life, was doing what I loved for a job and when sites that I was on didn't feel up to my standards, I walked away from them without guilt.  Before I would have clung on for fear of losing a client.  Now, if it is meant to be, the clients will come and I'm okay with that. 

As I have matured and grown wiser (or at least I think I have), one of my main priorities, behind myself, is family.   My family is essential in my life and my priority list starts out like this:

1.  Me, Sheri, the goddess of my own life (this includes self-care, meditation, self-love, laughter, respecting who I am, believing that I am enough as I am)

2.  Family - my spouse, my children, my grandchildren and my extended family

3.  Work - when I can but knowing when I need to walk away and rest

4.  Money - I know all my needs will be met by Universe (God) and have never gone hungry or homeless and there is no worry there.

My list is very simple.   I make myself a priority every day.   Even if driving to take care of another person in need, I can sing to myself, listen to uplifting spiritually guided messages, I can listen to rock and roll and sing my heart out and no one can criticize my singing.  I can enjoy my life whether in my office, my car, out for a walk, in a store. There are no limits - I create my reality.

I wanted to explain this to you this month as I have not been as stringent on the newsletters as of late.  I have been taking care of me and family the past month and I have had no guilt as I would in the past and I am not burning out (again, as I would have in the past). 

Look at your life, what are you doing right now?  Is it for you or for another?  Is it your choice?  There is ALWAYS a choice.  I do not want to hear, 'but I don't have a choice'.  Well, yes, you do. The walls will not fall down. If you have to quit your job, there will be another.  If you have to leave a spouse, there will be another.  You always have a choice. Use it wisely and make it about you and your happiness because if you make yourself happy, the world will start smiling around you.

I am very blessed by all of you that stick with me, however when someone leaves, I know it is their path or Universe has simply taken their energy out of my life.  It is never taken personally.  You are important to me and always will be. However, I am more important to me (as you should be to yourself).

Blessings to you

Sheri Baldwin

Soaring Free Spiritual Healing Centre

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