Today I Am

Yes, today I am. What does that mean to you?

Spirit has been sending me messages lately, actually bombarding me with messages in so many ways. I was not truly listening until I got that kick in the butt and the frustration and disappointment of life overwhelmed me. It wasn't for a long time, it was quick. The tragedy of my life (as I see all falling back into my old routines as tragedies) this week, this month, this year, is self abuse. This is something that every single person is guilty of, whether it be through alcohol, drugs, diet, not exercising, attitude, self loathing, laziness, anger, and I could go on and on.

I have been pondering my life lately as I have been working on my book. There has been much healing, anger, disappointment and outright "Oh Lord why me" cries. Life has not been kind to me over the years and the things that life has thrown at me would send most people over the edge.

At the time that each crisis, tragedy or abuse took place, I would find some way to bury my true self and pretend that I did not exist in the real world. Many of us have that make believe world we sit and dream of going to where no one can hurt us, not even ourselves. Mine is a beautiful log cabin in Northern Ontario, on the water, with a huge dock that I could sit on and dream, heal, play, meditate and write. When the world becomes too huge for me or the load of life becomes to heavy for me, I go to this place in my inner mind and dream of the peace that it brings me. We all need a place and many of us have one. It is a matter of acknowledging it to our true self.

Today I am - Yes today I am a better person than I was yesterday. Yes, today I am more healed than I was yesterday, Yes today I am able to forgive easier of others as well as myself than I was yesterday.

When I fall into old routines that are not productive and are actually counter productive, I can catch myself and say, yes, today I am not doing that which is for my Highest good, however.... now that I realize this, I can change the behavior, the thought, the feeling, the anger, the fear and turn it into something productive and positive.

Yes, today I am taking the steps that I have been putting off - moving forward with just one foot in front of the other. When it gets to be too much, again, I will stop, reflect, and then most importantly, I will let go and let all my troubles, worries, concerns and issues go to God's hands for Him to heal. I don't have to do the work myself, God is there to help me. He wants to help me and each one of you. He is a loving God, he is a passionate God, is a God with a warped sense of humor at times. He sends us messages all the time, it is us as humans with ego that tend not to listen or to ignore what we know to be true and right.

Yes, today I am open to love more deeply. I am able to find that compassion for others that previously I would have felt was disgust as I did not understand where they were coming from and what may have happened in their life to cause them to be the way they are. Yes, today I am open to forgive and hold loving thoughts in my heart for all that have crossed my path.

This is a wonderful message that spirit has sent to us. Even though I use the word "I" we are all a part of the great I AM,, the great Father God, the Universe, Source, Gaia, whoever your God is in your journey.

My God is a loving God, He is a kind God, He is a forgiving God and He loves with all our faults, mistakes and peculiarities. He sees each and every one of us as perfect. After all we were all created in God's image and God does not make mistakes. He wants us to live our life to the fullest, He wants us to laugh every single day, He wants us to forgive others, no matter what they are perceived to have done to put us in a position of needing to forgive them.

We are, I am, - yes, I am.

Namaste, blessings, love and light to all

Sheri